Chenisms

Dear Chen,

I have this fear of buying condoms. I feel as though I’m being judged and also worry that the person at the check-out will draw attention to them, you know, loudspeaker price-checks and the like.

Embarrassed.


Dear Embarrassed,

It sounds like you’re too shy to rise to the occasion! Think of it this way: the check-out person will most likely assume that you’re actually getting some action. As long as it’s not your parents or minister, there’s not much wrong with that.

If you still can’t face the music, there is always the occassional vending machine at certain places if you’re willing to pay $2 a pop. However, I think that’s better spent on a nice large cucumber (smooth variety - unless you like it rough) to take through the check-out with the condoms. Trust me – no one will dwell on the condoms then.

Happy fornicating,
-Chen